Your company’s most valuable asset is not its people – it’s the relationships between its people

An organisation’s most valuable asset is not its patents or trademarks, says Scott Miller. It’s not the supply chain, capacity to innovate or go-to-market strategy. It’s also not its people ­– it’s the relationships between its people that is their ultimate competitive advantage

Dr Stephen R Covey, the co-founder of FranklinCovey and the author of the seminal book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is known for his adages that inspired a generation of leaders. After working with and for him for 25 years, one of my favorites is, ‘Humble leaders more concerned with what is right than being right.’

This haunts me on a daily basis. In my roles as Chief Marketing Officer, author, podcast host, columnist, entrepreneur, father, husband, coach, and friend. Why is it haunting you ask? Because I’m not a naturally humble person. I like the limelight. I like to lead. I like to win and succeed. I like to be the best. I don’t necessary think that means I’m arrogant, what some might say is the opposite of being humble, but I’m self-aware enough to recognise my strengths and weaknesses.

And my struggle with humility is a weakness for me – or in HR speak, ‘an area of growth.’

I was raised to believe that humility meant you were shy, retiring, quiet, weak even. That humble people were the introverts that were stampeded over by the extroverts. That to lead and win you needed to be loud, charismatic, animated and ‘out in front’. Metaphorically and literally. So that’s what I did and who I because for the first twenty plus years of my career. I took the reins of every project, carefully researched the rules to ensure I could and would win, and likely trampled a few associates along the way. And when I say a few, I mean somewhere between a few dozen and a few hundred.  That isn’t to say I was manipulative or conniving. Or even a narcissist. I’d like to think I’ve grown others in their skills and careers. Just never though at the expense of my own.

And then I grew up. In my early 40’s.

I got married. Became a father to three sons. Became a son-in-law. Was promoted to lead large groups of well-educated and very competent colleagues. It’s then I came to realise that what’s most important in our personal lives is also what’s most important in our professional lives: our relationships.

It seems trite and would make a great poster framed in the company lobby, but it’s true. An organisation’s most valuable asset is not its patents or trademarks. It’s not the supply chain, capacity to innovate or go-to-market strategy. And contrary to much pablum, it’s also not your people. To clarify, your company’s most valuable asset is not its people. Rather, it’s the relationships between its people that is their ultimate competitive advantage.

How you treat each other. How you compliment and complement each other. How you resolve inevitable conflict. How you offer apologies. How you forgive each other. And perhaps most importantly, how you pre-forgive each other. Pre-forgiveness. It’s a leadership competency. It’s a vital concept in building high-trust relationships. Because the fact is, people are going to say and do things that annoy and offend each other. Regardless of training, education and awareness, people say and do stupid stuff. To each other. All the time. In families. In friendships. In the workplace.

It’s called being human and as much as we try to minimise and avoid it, it’s ever present. Sometimes called ‘micro-aggressions’, we all on both the offending and receiving end – daily. We’re also all trying to elevate our language, mindsets, and communication styles but we constantly fail, learn and retry. And this is where the value of relationships comes in play. It’s the only part of your company or organisation that can’t be copied, stolen, or recreated by your competition. Your relationship with others forms your culture – often defined as ‘how the vast majority of people behave the vast majority of time.’

Culture is not a trend or human resource buzz word. It’s a real, tangible aspect of every organisation and increasingly it’s a paramount for employees in their selection criteria for a prospective employer. I hear it consistently in interviews. In fact, it’s likely the most common question someone asks of me when in a job interview. The question is always phrased as, ‘Tell me about the culture here.’ What they really mean is, ‘what’s it like to work here. What’s it like when I make a mistake? How will I be treated when I am failing or drowning? Will I have any friends to confide in? Am I able to bring my ‘whole self’ to this company or do I need to assimilate into ‘your’ culture and learn how to ‘fit in’? Are risk and dissention tolerated, discouraged, or championed? Was my leader promoted because of their performance as an individual contributor, or because they are trustworthy, abundant and a great coach?

Can I have a vulnerable conversation with my leader and not be punished or shamed? Can I share something personal or a fear and expect it to be kept in confidence? Can I speak up safely when I disagree or see something questionable happening? Is my leader willing to be challenged? Is my leader willing to change?

This is what candidates really mean when they say, ‘Tell me about the culture here.’

All this boils down to relationships. As a leader, formal or informal, your key contribution in every role is building relationships. This involves creating transparency, clarifying expectations, making, and keeping commitments, leading difficult conversations, coaching continuously, celebrating wins and more often than you want, offering apologies, admitting mistakes, and righting wrongs. Building and maintaining effective relationships requires you to become a better listener, change your mind, be open to feedback and become more self-aware – about what it’s like to work with you.

By now the list may seem daunting and I’ve not written a single word about your actual business competencies. The business classes we took in college and academic projects we mastered. Daily business demands like understanding your business model, managing your P&L, creating systems, structures, and strategies, and then actually executing on them to achieve the results you’ve promised. Building alliances and launching products. Creating more economic value than others before you.

By now you’re wishing for that ‘rich uncle’ to pass peacefully…soon. (I sure am). Regardless of your role or level inside your organisation, we’re all leaders and we’re all tasked with the same outcome: building relationships with others that allow, enable, and accelerate our ability to achieve business results.

So – become a bit more patient. Recognise that not everyone sees the issue the same way you do. Remember, people have lives, challenges and issues outside work that may well be weighing on them and impacting their behavior. Slow down a bit. This may seem trite but recognise the fact that now every company is a technology company, and every company is in the same business: the business of relationships.

Reminds me of another adage from Covey, ‘With people, slow is fast and fast is slow.’

Slow down. You’re in the business of relationships and they take time and need nurturing. And if you’re lucky you’ll work in a culture where someone will make the same investment in you.